Insanely Rare New In Box GEC / Genalex Gold Lion Blue Tipped 6BQ5 / EL84 / N709

  
N709 / 6BQ5 / EL84. Blue Tipped / Halo Getter. This tube is so incredibly rare I didn't know it existed until I pulled it out of its box - and nearly dropped it in my excitement. I tried to find another blue-tipped tube to make a pair of them, but that was a big'lo nope. Because there isn't another one. Not here, not there, not anywhere. Just this one, and boy oh boy, she's a doozy.

Tested on a calibrated TV-7 where 50=Good/66% and 75=Brand New/100%. Return it for any reason. I don't give a cluck.

I only care why so I can make it right for you. Otherwise, I simply do not care.

As long as you haven't done anything unforgivably untoward with it, like feed it White Castle, leave it in a room alone with weird Uncle Stewy or expose it to that warty crotch virus Ted Cruz, return it. I'll take it back with open arms. Said plainly, I photograph and document every tube obsessively and comprehensively. Some might say I'm freakish about it. If you finger the paint with a clammy, excited fingers, I'll know.

If you write on the tube like an insolent child, I'll know. If you try to swap the tube I'll know.

I'll also know you must think I'm an idiot for believing that could ever work. And when you start to itch in places you don't ever want to itch, or you didn't know could itch, you'll know I wasn't kidding when I told you I keep both a Voodoo Priestess and a Witchdoctor on retainer - because I just told you.

It will be securely and beautifully packaged. In the event of a Ted Cruz exposure, smash and burn it immediately and then bathe in holy water for seven days. But don't go hawking grannies pearls just yet, my friend. I pay for everyone else.

If you're reading this wondering if you're a jerk or not, well.. Parking afflicted ex-ad guy turned tube monger. That's right, I park for shit.

That's the important bit. That's why I'm here.

You know how color blind people can't see color? To me, the world is just one big empty parking space. That's the curse of it, I was born free range, all nature and no nurture. I can't help it. One minute I'm minding my own business trying to deliver some tubes, next thing you know my Jekyll comes out and I'm hot wheeling my way up the curb. I'll stop it, drop it and won't even lock it. Fire zones are my freak. Block you into your own garage?

That spot may have your name on it, but whose car is that? Adverse possession is the name of my game. No lightning for your ride today. Asshhole idling right outside your window?

Peddle your hypocrisy somewhere else, Spandy. Don't see too many folks wearing tights in traffic court. Which is both unfair and disappointing.

I've begun to think I've taken things too far, though. Recently, I started parking in the police lot to attend to my business in traffic court.

I mean, it's right there. And I'm figuring they'd see my wheels and appreciate that I'm trying to do right. But that's not how they see it. But he's the kind of milquetoast idiot that pays for parking and still uses LOL and a YAHOO! Doc says if I want to get better I need to ask for help. And I want to get better, I really do. I'm counting on you. Just don't test me. I'll keep this short and simple. I test them with a recently calibrated Hickcock TV-7 that I meticulously maintain. I test to the best of my ability and I report all results honestly. My results are my results. Your results are your results. I will not litigate test results with you or anyone else that thinks they and their holy tester are God's special gift to testing, That said, you can certainly return a tube because your test results don't match my test results. And by wildly out of synch I mean door-nail dead like Lincoln.